hyanaimne | Exsilium

i forgive you.

i hope that it can help, let me know if you want me there.

but i want you to be careful around jesse from now on. i'm saying this as someone who loves him, not one of the people crying for blood, but sonya is right in saying that jesse isn't stable. if he can be kept calm, he's fine, but with the way things are escalating, please be careful

[she has a moment where she has to hold back tears. Everything has been terrible these last few days with no signs of it getting better, and things like Steph forgiving her is enough to make her cry. She holds it back, though. She has to handle all of this first]

I spoke with Miss Small - she agreed to let Saul be there. If you wish to come too I am not against it. I do not want him to feel as though I am ganging up on him. I have also told her that I do not want Sonya there. So it will simply be me and Miss Small.

I will. I have heard him in his cell and. It is like an entirely different person. Why has he gone so mental over all of this? I do not really understand, aside from - you know.

[With everyone else, she's been fairly vague about the state of well, Jesse.

But Tempest deserves the truth, or at least as much as Steph can give it, from her own understanding of the situation.]

i'll talk to saul and see what he says, but sonya not being there is definitely a good idea. if you still want a lawyer, i can talk to a friend who'd probably be willing to represent you.

i know. it really does seem like two different people. he feels betrayed, and he's scared and paranoid, so he's lashing out. he's not well, tempest. i don't know what the understanding of mental health is like in your world, but what we'd likely call this is a psychotic break. the best option would be to medicate him to keep him stable, but without the resources and mental health professionals, it isn't an option we can really persue

I do not know what a lawyer's purpose even is, with all of this going on. I do not need anyone representing me.

Mental health is not really a . . . thing? In my world? There are those who are crazy and psychotic, but many of them simply channel it into fighting or other things. [or into being murderers who burn down villages and try to kill their girlfriends] Is he even aware that his paranoia is because of what he has done?

Edited 2013-11-24 10:26 (UTC)

they're meant to represent your best interests and take care of you, but i think it's clear that sonya isn't quite doing that

where i'm from, we know that insanity is often caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. it can be treated with medication and therapy, but for someone to get better they have to want it. jesse doesn't think he deserves the chance to get better, or he doesn't think he's capable of it, so it's hard.

and no, i don't think he's aware of it. that might be asking too much of someone who's in the state he's in.

I think she is trying to, but she is going about it in the wrong way.

Why in the world would he think that? I do not understand all of this modern medicine and therapy, but he - damn but he is being an idiot. If only it were easy enough to smack enough sense into a person.

and she's letting her own feelings get involved. it's exactly what saul's done wrong with all this, and now sonya's doing it too.

because other people have hurt him and convinced him that he's bad. the world has really fucked him over, and that doesn't make it okay, what he's done. but it's part of the reason why he's acting the way he does.

Yes, I know. I spoke with Saul during and after. We had a bit of a yelling match at each other the first time.

Maybe I can talk to him about that - as someone who was also fucked over by the world. Just - anything to help him. I do not want to see him hurt, I want him to get better.

he does that.

you can try, but please be careful. after he was taken into custody i spent a long time trying to calm him down, and it wasn't pleasant. i'm not saying you can't handle it, but it's easy to underestimate people like jesse. i'd rather not see you get hurt again. and if it gets worse, you don't need to blame yourself.

Jesse and I have spoken before and. We are a lot alike in many ways. He understands the things I have told him about my life. Things I have done.

I cannot hope to even claim I can handle it, but I have to try.

it's the same with me and him. and it helps, but it might not be enough

be careful, tempest. and let me know if there's anything i can do to help. i don't agree with what you guys did, but this has all gotten completely out of hand and i don't wanna be mad at anyone anymore

You will be the first I contact if I need you Steph, thank you.

And I know. I am getting rather tired of being upset and angry. I - honestly, I cannot take much more of this.

you're welcome

[As of tomorrow, she'd refuse to do anything that involves being in a room with Jesse, though.]

rosyln's trying her best to resolve this quickly. how about a deal, you make it through this, and we'll crack open my last bottle of tequila once it's all done?

Miss Small? She is doing her best, and I applaud her for it. She has been more than helpful to us. I wish people would see that.

I do not know what tequila is, but if it is alcoholic than I am all for that.

people are too angry. i was too, but being angry isn't helping anyone. i'm trying to help her how i can.

it's definitely alcoholic

I am glad to hear that. Someone should buy that poor woman a drink after all of this.

Oh, good. I am absolutely for it, then.

we should let her take a vacation and buy as many drinks as she wants

i'll make sure to save some salt and lime and teach you how we do things on earth. it'll be fun

That sounds like a lovely idea. I do not think they would even have a problem with me going, since you and she will be there. Flawless plan.

That sounds rather odd but I will look forward to it.

i'd suggest we just sneak off, but considering i was guarding you guys for a while there that might not be the smartest thing to say.

it'll be fun. which i'm sure is something we might both need by the end of this.

Not quite, but I think we will not have a problem.

God, yes. Have you noticed, with the exception of Sonya and Chloe, that the lot of the idiots making this worse are boys?

probably not

and yes, yes i have. i don't know how many times you need to tell a man that he doesn't have to protect you or take revenge on your behalf, but apparently it's a whole fucking lot

though i can't say i helped the situation much either. i don't have the best handle on my temper

[but she's trying]

I completely agree. I can take revenge on someone all by myself. I'm quite well-versed in doing so, actually. It is nice they are so thoughtful but in this case I wish they would simply just offer - I don't know, hugs or comfort or some other thing.

Nor I, honestly. But with the way things have been going I have only lost my temper a few times.

i would've been pretty happy with a hug, yeah. even if he'd just wanted to yell at you or something. i mean, no offence, but it would've been better than all this bullshit.

i think they only time i haven't been pissed off is when i'm too exhausted to be

It certainly would have been much better. I do not know why no one seems capable of using their words around here. I am terrible at it and yet I manage it.

It is hard to be anything when one is exhausted.

i didn't even think about it, you know? as soon as i heard what happened i went to try to calm jesse down, and i guess i just assumed he'd have mentioned why. i would've said something sooner otherwise.

yeah

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hyanaimne - 2013-11-27 20:36 (UTC) - Expand

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about twenty minutes later

tempest bb :(

someone get her off this crazy train

steph wants off, too

let's go to belize and I don't mean that in the breaking bad way

deal; they'll have to talk the npcs into letting them go but steph can sweet talk

after everything I don't think they'll be too against it

bribing with booze might help

it'll absolutely help booze is a very good bargaining chip

the best tbh

absolutely but we gotta make sure we have enough for us

that's why steph is friends with ella tbh

you got the hookup girl

she knows how to play this game

mvp right here

p. much

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